(Unofficially of course)
"Blessed are they who lead the public from the subliminal to the ridiculous,
for they shall be called advertising people"
Is Advertising Affecting Our Lives?
My "General Electric" Alarm Clock goes off early (to early as usual), as I slowly wake up to my favorite radio station and listen to them rant and rave and occasionally play a good tune. I roll myself out of bed and head for the bathroom.
I go sit on the American Standard and grab a handful of "Charmin." I get up and I proceed to grab my tube of "Tarter Control Crest" and my "Reach" toothbrush and start brushing away my morning breath and fuzzy tongue feeling. I floss with my "Johnson and Johnson Waxed Dental Floss" and then gargle with my "Minty Fresh Scope." Time to wash my face while I turn on my "Kohler" faucets and wait for the water to heat up, I grab my "Noxzema" and smear it on my face. As the water gets hot, I rinse and proceed to my morning shower.
I jump into the shower and grab my bar of "Ivory" Soap and start lathering up. I grab my bottle of "Pert Plus" and proceed to cleanse my hair, (Hummm, this morning my hair feels dry) I grab my "Infusium 23 Stay in Conditioner" and rub that through my hair. I get out of the shower and I grab a "Q-tip" to get the water out of my ears and I towel off and head for my room.
I sit down on my bed and grab my "Goody" hair pick and run it through my hair. I then turn on my "Vital Sassoon" hairdryer and start drying my hair while my "Revlon" curling iron warms up. I recomb out my dry hair and start curling it. Once the curls are set, I pick them out again and fluff and spray with "Pantene Pro V Hairspray"(realizing the bottle is almost empty).
I put on some "Almay" moisturizer and get out my "Sudden Change Undereye Cream" and start applying it to my eye areas. I then get out the "CoverGirl" concealer stick and touch up the blotches on my face. I apply my "Revlon Anti-Aging Cover-up" to my face. I grab my "Almay blush" and apply it to my cheeks and apply some "Maybelline Mascara."
I then proceed to scrounge up something to wear to work and take it to be "General Electric" to be ironed. I go back to my room and put on my "No-Nonsense Panty-hose." Slip into my "Liz Claiborne" dress and find a matching pair of "Nordstrom Pumps." I head to the fridge and crab a glass of "Tropicana Orange Juice" and pop a "Claritin"(major pollen outside). I say goodbye to my birds and set the "HoneyWell" alarm and leave the house.
I get into my "Jeep Grand Cherekee" and start driving down the hill to see a construction worker holding out a slow down sign. I stop into the "7-11" at the bottom of my hill to grab some cash and a pack of "Marlboro Light 100's." I pass the "McDonalds" and get onto the freeway. I pull off at the next off-ramp into the "Chevron" station for my daily morning "Starbucks" latte.
I head off again for work, passing the "Boeing" plant and "Kenworth" facilities. While waiting at the light, I see a billboard for "Denny's" and their "Grand Slam Breakfasts". The light changes and I turn onto Rainier Avenue and start seeing images/signs of "K-Mart, "Walmart", "Arby's", "Minute Lube", "International House of Pancakes(IHOP)", "Kentucky Fried Chicken" and the local "Brown Bear Car Wash"(realizing my "Jeep" could really use a bath, but that would make me late for work).
I turn the corner again, noticing all the car dealerships for "Toyota", "Chrysler", "Ford", "Honda", "Acura", "Subaru", "Saturn,"(realizing my car looks like a hunk of junk and is aging...but I don't really have the money to afford a new car...but I can dream anyways).
I pull into my offices parking lot and go to my office. I check my "US West Voice Mail" and start jotting down messages on my "Boise Cascade Recycled Paper Notepad." I turn around and turn on my Computer with "Intel" inside and wait for our "Microsoft NT" network to boot-up. I open up my "Microsoft Outlook" email, and find an email from "Egghead Software"(mega deals inside, (hummmm...what new toy can I add to my home computer?).
My co-workers start arriving and the phone starts a ringing. I pick up the phone; itís a salesrep wanting an appointment with me. I open up my "Day Runner" and pencil them in. They also had a question for me when they visit, so I grab a "Post-it-note" and jot it down for accessing/remembering later. I proceed to process normal bills/invoices for the remainder of the morning.
Lunchtime arrives....hummmmm..What do I feel like? Do I have the time to get a nice meal or should I fast food it? hummmm...Well I need to grab a few things from the local "Fred Myers" so I opt for fast food. I run into Fred Meyer and grab a few more pairs of "No-Nonsense", some more hairspray, a pair of "Lee" jeans and a pair of "Nike" sneakers. My tummy starts a grumbling, hummmmmm..."Burger King"? "Arby's"? No, definitely a "finger licken good day." So I drive through "Kentucky Fried Chicken" for a dose of grease and cholesterol and head back to my offices, admiring the nice shiney new cars on Auto Row...(there I go dreaming again).
Time to head home from work, I leave the parking lot and head off home. I notice the "Albertsonís"(thinking about dinner) but realize I need bird food and pull into the "Dolphin Pets" and proceed to buy stuff for my birds. I get back into my car and start heading home again.
I get home..rumage through my cabinets and find some "Hamburger Helper" for dinner and start cooking it up. I grab a "Sprite" out of the fridge and take my dinner to the living room coffee table, sit down on my "Broyhill" couch and turn on my "Sony" television.
While eating my dinner and watching the news I start noticing some of the commercials (only advertising folks would actually notice the commercials --since we like to judge them for appeal, creativity etc....but I could be wrong).
How many of your days are just like mine? Given, some of you use different personal products and shop at various places throughout the day (some of my references are not in all markets)? How many different Advertised Products are you using in your daily lives?
It's truly interesting to think of a day this way, and before today, I hadn't really paid much attention to how much commercialism really filled my daily life. I can remember days before computers, Post-it-notes (which by the way was a boo-boo of some scientist and his secretary found a use for them). Or the days before email and faxes....Gueezzzz...see what industrialization and commercialism has done to us!!!
Thanks Madison Avenue Leaders For This Award