Having a smoking section in a restrant is like haveing a pee-ing section in a pool
It amuses me how a persons poetic ability is aroused by the smell of shit!
Very funny, Scotty. Now beam up my clothes.
*Graffiti on BCH school condom machine*
WARNING: This machine does not sell starburst!
*Sign outside a tattoo parlour*
If you're looking for me....I just left.
Necophilia: That uncontrollable urge to crack open a cold one.
What I wanted to say they wouldn't print!
It wasn't me. Nobody saw me do it. You can't prove anything.
I told you NOT to put the parrot in the microwave!
Dogs are a man's best friend
Diamonds are a girl's best friend
Who is the more intelligent sex?
NO ONE IS A VIRGIN BECAUSE LIFE SCREWS US ALL!!!
A sex symbol becomes a thing. I hate being a thing.
from Detlor & Associates
Salammi Luv's Josh
Picklez Luv's Josh
Salammi and Picklez Luv's Josh
If you want to bitch and moan, be a telemarketer.
Men are like parking spaces, all the good ones are taken!
God created women because sheep can't cook.
God created woman and then immediately came hell.
In any serious problem you can find trace of a woman.
Here I sit, I'm at a loss.
Tryin' to shit out taco sauce.
And if I do, I hope and pray,
That I don't blow my asshole away.
Deep inside every heterosexual male is a lesbian screaming to get out.
Life is a jest
all things show it.
Thought so once
and now I know it.
-written on the condom machine in the mens rroom
Homeless people have great disapline. They stay out all winter and never skip work.
Giving a shout to all my Gahanna peeps! The only city in Ohio called "Hell"!
from Geoff & Mindy
If a man is speaking in the woods and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?
MENopause,MENstrate,MENstruation,PMS...Putting up with Men's S**t!!!
MEN are in all the female's physical problems....ya think?!
HATED BY MANY
LOVED BY FEW
RESPECTED BY ALL.
NEVER ARGUE WITH A FOOL... PEOPLE MAY NOT BE ABLE TO TELL YOU APART.
If winners never quit, and quitters never win, then who came up with the phrase "Quit while you're ahead!"?
If Barbie is so popular, then how come you have to buy all of her friends?
How come people always say "It's only a game..." when they're winning?
I think, therefore I am single.
from Bill & Judy
Q. How can you tell when a woman is on her period?
A. Because the hor-moans.
I GET MY LISCENSE IN 11 DAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GIRLS ARE LIKE PAMPERS,THEY'RE ALWAYS ON YOUR ASS AND THEIR FULL OF SH*T
WOMEN ARE LIKE PARKING SPACES,ALL THE GOOD ONES ARE TAKING EXECPT THE HANDICAP
WOMEN ARE LIKE CONDOMS IF THEY'RE NOT IN UR WALLET,THEY ARE ON UR DI*K
CALL ME THE PUERTOROC ANDREW DICE CLAY WITH THE RIDDLES/FROM THE MIDDLE/OF LIL ITALY,LITTLE/ DID WE FIDDLE/TO MIDDLE/MEN WHO DIDNT DO DIDDLES/ELOVER! ISUE
if toilet paper is called super duper pooper scupper,
and a bra is called over the shoulder flopper stoper,
and a jock strap is called lower decker pecker checker,
what do u call a punched out drunken Japanese whos father has diarrea:
a slap happy jappy... with a crap happy pappy