Good for Nothing
January 10, 1998
That's about how I feel right now... Jevim's at school, typing to me on IRC from his linux box. I'm bored, I royally screwed up earlier, throwing a fit because he wanted to get out of the dorm. It's the first night in a long time he hasn't had to fight his sister or his parents for online time, and even though none of his friends are back around yet, he still wanted to go. I felt like I was just online for his convenience, when he didn't have anything better to do.
What I didn't realize was that after we talked on the phone for a few minutes, he'd changed his mind by time we got back to chatting online. I was upset because I was being left behind like yesterday's leftovers, and started getting more upset. By the time he'd made it clear he really had changed his mind, I felt like what I was being... a stupid, spoiled brat, who wanted him for myself tonight, nevermind what he wanted.
He put up with me and my stupidity, of course, and finally got me to seeing that he had really changed his mind and no longer felt the need to get out, and so I'm slowly recovering from being upset (more with myself than anything, when all was said and done), but I'm still lonely... I miss him even if I am chatting with him... but he's doing a good job of making me laugh at times, which is cheering me up... Sometimes unintentionally, like this little typo of his on IRC
Jevim: I need to moe around a bit... gonna get a drink, and I'll be back, 'k?
Lisana: 'k... you gonna larry and curly, too? *grinning and ducking*
Jevim: i'm gonna larry right down beside you and curly up to you. :-*
Lisana: *laughing out loud* *kiss* that sounds nice... :)
Even just rereading it makes me smile again... I'm glad he has such a wonderful, silly sense of humor. Laughter really is the best medicine.