Being Castrated

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You are still a male
Long Term Effects
Hormone Therapy
Depression from hormone withdrawal
Testosterone Patches
Penile Erection Kit
Viagra and other medications
Benefits
Drawbacks
My own Castration
You are still a male after castration

Being castrated for a male is not the end of the world. It means a drastic change in your life, but life goes on. No matter why you lost your nuts, you can lead a normal life, except for the fact you can not make babies. You can adopt children, but you can no longer create them. You can still achieve erections with hormones and still have orgasms and ejaculations.

Let's contemplate the fate of J. W. Bobbitt had the police not found his amputated member. I consider myself in better shape. I've seen him in action ($14.95 through discount adult video outlets) and he's back in shape. I'd certainly like to check it out for myself, intimately, but he's said to be straight.

I'm a gay male. Most of the males I have sex with are not concerned with what I have between my legs but what they have and where they are going to put it. The ones who are interested in my up front equipment, I can handle. I start out with making them interested in their own equipment and focus there, and whatever else comes up is gratuitous (well, not really, sometimes they have to ply me with dinner and a movie first).

Long Term Effects

A male who has been castrated and who chooses not to undergo hormone therapy will gradually put on fat around his hips. His nipples may become tender and his breasts may grow larger. His penis will atrophy due to non-use. I decided to go with hormones.

A male's penis is maintained in its size and ability through the nightly erections that accompany the rapid eye movement REM dream state. The average number is about 4 erections each lasting about 45 minutes. That is why males awake in the morning often with erections. A fellow eunuch tells me he has lost most of his penis after a year and a half without hormones. He explained he simply couldn't handle hormones, that he felt out of control when he was taking hormones. I could understand how he felt, having experienced the real calm of being an asexual eunuch and also the real active libido that returned with my starting hormone shots.

Yes, males are driven by their gonads. Without hormones, most males are docile, happy puppies. With hormones, males become more agressive (not angry, particularly, just agressive and assertive) and want sex. I found that no one looked appealing to me in a sexual way when I was asexual. After, I began to experience that sensation males feel that they've forgotten to notice, the tumescing of the penis, that they interpret as feeling attracted to someone. I noticed because I had lost it, and then it returned. I noticed when my penis wouldn't respond, and I noticed again when it did. When you are mentally prepared for sex but your body has not yet responded to the hormones to cause "mechanical motion", you are keenly aware of things happening down there.

I regularly awake with a morning erection, which is always reassuring to me. It means that my hormone levels are sufficient to let me function as a male, and that I am, in fact, functioning. It's a great ego and confidence builder, especially if I can roll over and poke my bedmate awake with it. Hormone levels are highest in males in the morning hours. That's also true with eunuchs who take hormone shots. It's part of the male circadian rhythm.

Hormone Therapy

I take Depo-tesosterone 200mg/ml 1cc once every three weeks (Upjohn Pharmaceuticals). I inject it into the upper muscles of my buttocks using a 22ga 1.5in hypodermic needle. It is a suspension in cottonseed oil to slow the absorption of the medication by the body. The long chain molecules are processed by the body into true serum testosterone gradually over a period of weeks.

About 4 weeks after I was castrated, I lost the ability to have erections. I also found myself experiencing hot flashes. A couple of times while at work, people would notice I was flushing in the face. I lost all sexual interest in males. A friend noticed this when he pointed out a particularly studly speciman at the beach and I failed to respond in my usual sluttly manner. My complete lack of response of any kind was noted.

I saw my doctor, who started me on hormone shots. At first, we tried once a month. After about a week after the first hormone shot, I achieved an erection, and I was really happy. Two days later, I was also able to achieve orgasm and ejaculation, which surprised me. I was not expecting normal ejaculation. The fluid in the ejaculate is mostly from the prostate, so it is not diminished much by castration. I could now function normally. I called a friend and asked him if he would lend a hand to my recovery, so to speak. We celebrated all night.

Depression from hormone withdrawal

I experienced severe depression the last couple of days before my next monthly injection. I went through this for two months before I contacted my doctor again and he adjusted my interval to once every two weeks. This turned out to be quite interesting. I now had the hormone levels of some 18yo horny stud and I was hot to trot after anything in pants anytime, anyhow. It was actually embarrassing. I experienced an erection on the nude beach. We tuned down the interval to once every three weeks. I'm much easier to be with in polite society now.

I read the medication inserts for the Depo-testosterone carefully and found that severe depression was one side effect of the medication, in that withdrawal from male hormones, like a female's menopause, may bring on bouts of depression. These episodes made me much more aware of the effects of hormones on the body and mental outlook.

Testosterone Patches

I tried the daily Androderm patches, and these worked well. They produce a very even level of hormones since they are applied new each day. There are other daily patches that other males can use, but I can't, since those patches need to be applied to the scrotum, and I no longer have one. The Androderm patches stick well, with acrylic adhesive. They have to be applied to the upper thighs, stomach, upper chest, or upper arms. In my case, I'm so hairy that I had to shave those areas to apply the patches. The patches also leave some glue circles, which can be rubbed off fairly easily, but it's still not pretty. I returned to the injections and made them into a little scene by thinking of getting my refills each time, or now I could call my boyfriend and tell him I just got a refill and I wanted to see if everything were functioning. I trained him to give me the injections. Of course, I have to be naked to let him do that.

Penile Erection Kit

For those males who are not capable of normal penile erection, there is also a penile injection kit available through urologists. Since my hormone levels go up and down, and since I have severe insecurity regarding my natural abilities to perform, I'm not always able to produce on demand. I asked my urologist for help, and he prescribed, after some in office clinical tests to work out the type of medication mix and amount, an injection kit for penile erections.

That kit consists of a combination of three ingredients including prostaglandins and two others, a hypodermic needle of 30ga half inch, and alcohol swabs. To get an erection, I stick the hypodermic into the medication bottle and withdraw 0.2cc of medication, then I wrap a rubber band around the base of my penis to trap the blood in it, then carefully push the needle into the erectile tissue, the corpus cavernosum of the penis (1 to 3 o'clock on the circle), and inject the medication.

After about five minutes, I feel the penis filling up and tightening the rubber band, so I can remove it and massage the penis into erection, one that lasts about an hour or two. Despite the preparations involved in doing all of this, the knowledge that I can perform on demand (up to twice a week max), usually far longer than any gay male would want me to, is incredibly uplifting. I have found my ability to function normally, without medical enhancement, has improved also.

Let's face the fact that having had your nuts cut off will impact your self-esteem and your confidence in being able to perform, regardless of other circumstances. Anything that helps improve your own self image will improve your ability to perform. Simply having the testes removed will cause the scrotum to shrink because there is nothing inside it any more. I've seen some eunuchs who look like there's no scrotum, just like mine, and others who still have a flappy empty one.

A warning for the kit users: if you overdose, you can experience a "terminal" erection, or priapism, a state where the erect penis will not detumesce by itself. If left untreated, this will usually cause blood clots in the trapped blood and loss of the penis or at least erectile function. This requires medical intervention to make the penis detumesce or lose its erection, sometimes resulting in total and permanent loss of penis erectile function. I'm quite careful with how I handle the kit.

Viagra and other medications

I tried Viagra as soon as it became available.  My urologist, who had prescribed the tri-mix penile erection injection medication, gave me a trial prescription for Viagra 50mg tablets to see how they would do.  I'm a difficult subject, apparently, because that strength didn't work for me.  I next tried the 100mg tablets and they did work.  Now, I have an alternative to the injections to achieve a usable erection.  When trying the new strength pills, I tried it one morning (when male hormone levels are normally highest, even with castrated males taking testosterone, due to lower metabolic rate over night).  I was startled to find I had some sort of color vision shift, where white things looked light purple and I had after images that were blue when I saw bright reflections of light, like the overhead lights in the bathroom reflecting off the shiny sink. The effects went away after about an hour.  I immediately made an appointment with my ophthalmologist for my annual eye exam and was able to see him the next day.  Nothing wrong with my eyes, and he could not explain the blue effects I had the previous day. I went to the pharmacy and asked the pharmacist for a package insert that normally comes with a complete bottle of pills for Viagra, took it home and read it in detail.  I was embarrassed to read that color shift was one of the rare (3 percent of men doing the clinical trials) side effects of the medication and that it was not harmful.  The action of the medication sometimes affects the chemicals associated with color vision.  I'm so happy with the primary effect, I'm not going to worry about that side effect.  Besides, I'll probably use the medication at night from now on when color vision is impaired with the lights off anyway.

Benefits

I can cross my legs now without trapping my large low-hanging balls.

Someone expecting to incapacitate me with a kick to my balls is going to be surprised.

I can help treat prostate cancer or other problems simply by stopping hormone injections.

If I find some interesting male at the bar and he is reluctant to play top because I'm such a butch bear type, I can explain that he's the only one that wears the balls between the two of us, so he can be top without any argument from me. This sometimes works. If it doesn't and he wants me to be top, I can fall back on either my natural abilities, dildos, or the injection kit, in which case, he's in for one very long bumpy ride.

Drawbacks

I no longer have quite the large basket in a swim suit I used to have. I used to avoid bikinis because I had an embarrassingly large basket with my large nuts. I think it was because my mother once said something about my swim suit being a little too form fitting that I stopped wearing skimpy ones. Now, I can wear what I like.

I can no longer father children. I shoot blanks. I think my parents miss that most. I told them, and they were upset, then understanding and supportive. Besides, they now have 9 grandchildren and 3 great grandchildren so far, and I have 3 siblings. I feel they've produced enough.

I have to do the injections or other methods to maintain my male sexual characteristics. If I stop, I lose the ability to have sex, and I could lose girth and length of my penis over a period of time. I'll eventually stop hormone therapy, but hopefully not for some years, as I find it quite nice to have sex. Maybe late in my 90s.

I can never be Pope. The Pope must have a complete set. That is a rule that was set many years ago when they discovered they had elected a female Pope.

It would be difficult to function as a military commissioned officer if the enlisted men knew I were a eunuch. I'm retired now, so that question will not come up. The Chinese had great eunuch administrators and generals. No hereditary problems there.

My Own Castration

This is what I told my doctor.Want to discuss any of this with me? Feel free to send me email, as I'm quite frank, as you can see, and open to discuss absolutely anything, anytime. If you happen to be male above the age of consent and interested in fondling a particularly furry teddy bear, please provide me with intimate details of your physical attributes to give me a focus for my sex fantasies. A nice revealing nude photo would be very welcome, and I can send you one. Thanks.

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